Wednesday, December 17, 2008

When Asians wannabe Caucasians

Got this from Rachel last week. Ever wondered how your names would confuse someone. Here's an example :-
Caller : Can I speak to Annie Wan (anyone)
Operator : Yes, you can speak to me.
Caller : No. I want to speak to Annie Wan.
Operator : You're talking to someone. Who is this??
Caller : I'm Sam Wan (someone). And I need to talk to Annie Wan. It's urgent!!
Operator : I know you're someone and you want to talk to anyone. But what's this urgent matter about?
Caller : Well...just tell my sister Annie Wan, that our brother Noel Wan (no one) was involved in an accident. Noel Wan got injured is Noel Wan is being sent to the hospital. Right now, Avery Wan (everyone) is on his way to the hospital.
Operator : Look. If no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital, then the accident isnt an urgent matter. You may find this hilarious but I certainly have no time for this!!!
Caller : You are so rude!! Who are you??
Operator : I am Saw Lee (sorry)
Caller : Yeah, you should be sorry. Now give me your FREAKIN name!!!
Names you wouldn't want to have (English names + Chinese surnames) :-
1. Anne Chang = Dirty (mandarin)
2. Anne Chin = Keep Quiet (mandarin)
3. Faye Chen = Dusty (mandarin)
4. Carl Chen = Buttocks (hokkien)
5. Monica Cheng = Touching your buttocks (hokkien)
6. Lucy Leow = You're dead (hokkien)
7. Jane Tan = Frying eggs (mandarin)
8. Suzie Liow = Lose till death (hokkien)
9. Henry Mah = Hate your mom (mandarin)
10. Corrine Tai = Poor fellow (hokkien)
11. Paul Chan = Bankrupt (mandarin)
12. Nelson Tan = Bird laying eggs (mandarin)
13. Leslie Tong = Rubbish bin (mandarin)
14. Carmen Teng = Leg hair long (hokkien)
15. Connie Mah = Call your mother (cantonese)
16. Danny See = Squeeze you to death (hokkien)
17. Rosie Teng = Screws and nails (hokkien)
18. Pete Tsai = Nose droppings (hokkien)
19. Macy Koh = Never die before (cantonese)


mingto said...

wew..... nice a blog...

cleffairy said...

Walao, u got me laughing like a fool! LMAO... Thank god my name is Elizabeth... *grinZ* No shits, this is hilarious!

Calvin Soo KJ said...

mingto, thanks. drop by often. cheers..... :)

clef, yeap. i was laughing so loud that i farted....hehehehe

cleffairy said...

shhhh... shhh, dun fart so loud la, paiseh lah! LOL.

peteformation said...

Bro, You missed out Danny Leng! LOL

Josephine said...

I like the title of this post.
hmm, if i were to write this post, maybe i will give something like "Whn 'yellow skin' wanna be 'red hair' (Angmo)...

suituapui said...

My old lady's name + surname is "You die better" in Hokkien! LOL!!!

Malaysian Joe said...

Yesterday I read in the obituary page, there is one guy whose chinese name is Si Liaw.... how ironic...

Calvin Soo KJ said...

clef, too late d. hehehe

pete, ya lor hor.....forgot about anymore or not? :)

josephine, id post when yellow is red.. :)

stp, serious?? lmao

mjoe, wouldnt know to be sad or want to laugh :P

Malaysian Joe said...

I chuckled....

Talking about names... I know a friend who was at the butt end of jokes all the time... his name was Kan Chin Ho.

We always joked about whether his abilities in bed is as good as his name.

Calvin Soo KJ said...

mjoe, that's funny. is he married...with kids. then cannot question his ability

amoker said...

I guess Kan Chin ho is a man la... too bad. kekek

A gem of a posting, Calvin

Malaysian Joe said...

Of course its a him. He migrated to Australia liao and trying to get rid of his chinese name.

Poor fler, I was always wondering why his dad named him in that manner.

peteformation said...

One guy in nothern state name Harry Kok

kenwooi said...

haha 'great' names! funny! =D

Malaysian Joe said...

I think we are wicked.... talking about ppl's names.. :).